Please Help Build An Ark
By Ofar Quarson
If anyone can offer advice, assistance or support to this great cause please get in touch. We will be following the progress of the project with great interest.
Dear Sirs,
Over the past years, I have witnessed numerous attempts by the worlds leading archaeologists and construction engineers to re-create some of mankind's most historical achievements. Treks to the North Pole on foot, recreation of Stone Age villages, medieval battles and re-enactment's, attempts to transport a Bluestone to the famous site of Stonehenge without the use of modern day equipment or techniques. This kind of project is otherwise knows as ‘Experimental archaeology’.
Although, all of these projects seem insignificant to that which we propose to undertake.
My organization has been corresponding with the participants from the great 'Thor Heyerdahl' expeditions – probably most famous for his Kon-Tiki expedition, balsa wood rafts and reed boats. Together we are looking for sponsorship, funding and support to re-create one of mankind's most famous journeys:
)) |
We have written to the following organizations and are confident that given the nature of our project and the publicity it will create they will be eager to assist.
London Zoo - For help in supplying animals, two of each would be required.
P&O Ferries - To help with navigation and supply of a ships Captain.
Tesco's / Wall Mart - For help with forty days and forty nights of food and drink supplies.
Do it all / Ikea - To help supply wood, nails etc.
Virgin - I’m sure Richard Branson would be up for the part of Noah (and help funding as this is going to cost a few bob).
Many friends have laughed at my idea and enthusiasm for this project, I guess in the same way Noah was mocked. However with the ever increasing effect of global warming and rising sea levels our project may fast become a necessity for the future of mankind and I know they will all want be first in the queue as soon as the waters start to rise.
I look forward to hearing from any of your readers who would be interested in participating or assist with funding/sponsorship.
Time is of the essence as we have a provisional launch date of 1st July 2008.
Yours truly,
Ofar Quarson
Ofar_quarson[at]hotmail.com
Get more spoof stories here:- Cool - Biggest ever fossils found
- Tetchy - Astronaut slams NASA cleaning regime
- Interesting - Dragon psyche probed
- Bizarre - Polar bears to be retrained
Your Say
The Branson link should suit all parties. It's common knowledge that God likes working with virgins.
Harry Celdon, Manchester
Image: Ofar Quarson
Share this
