Doctor, Doctor...
By Dave Hall
For all you hypochondriacs out there, Dave Hall continues his regular look at a some of the more unusual medical conditions, as well as some you thought you knew all about.
This week: AVIAN INFLUENZA.
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Condition – Avian influenza is also more commonly known as avian flu or bird flu. It’s not a case of sneezing swifts or coughing crossbills, but a disease caused by a number of strains of the influenza A virus.
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Contagion – You’d need to be doing almost illegal things to a chicken to be able to catch it directly, but there is a risk that the virus will jump from birds to humans and be transmitted more easily in future. If you must go and get those fresh eggs, cover your mouth first.
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| Danger of death – Death rates are about 50%, but most of those have occurred in areas where people have very close (?) contact with infected birds – disgusting. Since 1993, 194 people, mostly in Indonesia, have died from the disease. | |
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Incurability? – Humans have no immunity to the virus, which is why it could be so deadly if it crossed the species boundary. In that case, it would take a long time to find a cure, so let’s hope it doesn’t get that far.
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Likelihood of getting time off work – You’ll have a 10-mile exclusion zone around you should you actually get the disease, in which case you’ll not be going anywhere. Best not tell the boss you’ve been getting up close and personal to some waterfowl, as that’s probably a sackable offence.
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| Brag-ability – Fancy telling your friends you’re ‘flued up with avian influenza? I’d shut up about it so you’re not the butt of some rather crude bird related jokes. Lest said, soonest forgotten. |
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Overall ridiculousness – Not very common in humans but still one to be aware of. If you’re going to stay on a farm anywhere in the Far East – take protection. |
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More conditions to come soon:
Chikungunya, Mad Cow Disease and more.
Find more curious conditions in Doctor Doctor. If you can't wait for the next Doctor Doctor, then why not find a Phunny Phobia to keep you going?
Photo: Fir0002
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