Doctor, Doctor...
By Dave Hall
For all you hypochondriacs out there, Dave Hall continues his regular look at a some of the more unusual medical conditions, as well as some you thought you knew all about.
This week: 'PLAGUE'
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Condition – Bubonic Plague is a form of the deadly infectious disease caused by the bacteria Yersinia pestis. Plague is mainly a disease in rodents and fleas. An infected rodent is bitten by a flea, which then becomes infected. The flea, its stomach blocked by the bacteria, becomes ravenously hungry and munches on human flesh, gets full up, promptly throws up (over the wound) and infects the person - charming. Once it’s hit the lungs, it can spread rapidly.
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Contagion – Plague is mainly restricted to rodents and fleas. But in the pneumonic version, human lungs become infected – and person-to-person transmission through respiratory droplets is more likely. Although fairly widespread in some parts of the world, if you live in Europe there are no plague-infected animal populations and you should be relatively safe.
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| Danger of death – Without diagnosis and treatment, the pneumonic infection can be fatal in one to six days and mortality in untreated cases may be as high as 95%. |  |
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Incurability? – There is a vaccine, but it involves being jabbed twice daily for seven days, not great if you suffer from a fear of needles (aichmophobia).
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Likelihood of getting time off work – Just try stepping into the office after you rang in sick the day before with plague. You’ll be signed off quicker than you can say “Alexandre Yersin and Shibasaburo Kitasato” (they both discovered the bacteria in 1894).
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| Brag-ability – If you survive, and many do, then it could be a good one to bring up on a Friday night, just don’t expect people to shake your hand after you mention it though. |
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Overall ridiculousness – We shouldn’t take the Mickey too much, its deadly and found over most of the world – it's especially rife in the USA! And contrary to popular belief, Ring a Ring o' Roses has nothing to do with the plague. So there. |
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More conditions to come soon:
Pica, Mermaid Syndrome and more.
Find more curious conditions in Doctor Doctor. If you can't wait for the next Doctor Doctor, then why not find a Phunny Phobia to keep you going?
Photo: CDC, USA
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