Star Letter: Plant a Tree
By Tom Payani
If you're searching around for ways to minimise your impact on the environment then look no further than Tom Payani's wise words of wisdom.
Dear Prof,
Recently it has come to my attention that the issue regarding carbon footprints is a significant one. I have started to feel very guilty about the whole thing. It is essential that we all change our mindsets and take a greater responsibility in reducing our carbon footprints.
Therefore I have taken it upon myself to be more ecologically conscious. From this day forth whenever I see Al Gore on a crane getting upset about the rise in ocean temperatures, I will plant a tree. Whenever a neo-con explains to me that global warming is a just a natural cycle whilst we are driving to the gym in their hummer, I will punch them in the face… then plant a tree.
There are many ways to reduce our carbon footprint; bravery being a key factor. I have started to turn the big light off when I go to bed – we all need to do our bit. Whether it’s turning lights off, walking rather than driving or eating hummus, we have to take on the responsibility of going out into the woods at night and planting trees without looking conspicuous. It is a great battle we face my friends, we must not allow this problem to get out of control, we need to stand up as environmentalists and attempt to take care of this planet we have been given. Trees are our only hope (and that kid with the wand and lightning scar, he can do anything – but apart from him trees are pretty important). If we plant enough trees then it will mean that I can stop feeling guilty about Ryanair weekenders to Prague and our tree-filled world will be a better, and greener, place.
Yours with the kindest of regards, Tom Payani
Send your letters, thoughts and musings to [email protected]. Too shy? Try our Facebook group instead. Alternatively you can get more from Tom or warm yourself globally with the Null:
- Genius - Climate change solved
- Funny - Climate change solved again
- Interview - The man who swam the North Pole
- Strange - Do they really think this'll work?
Image: Penelope Pene
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