The Invisible Man
By William Dum
Centre for Scientific Excellence, 12 Beacon Close, Southend-on-Sea, Essex, UK.
Once in a lifetime, someone discovers something magical - last Thursday that someone was me. While working away in my home laboratory overlooking the North Sea, I was struck by a moment of genius. Whilst formulating a new paint for my dining room, I realised that whatever I painted vanished before my very eyes. I tested this rigorously; to my annoyance as it happened because I lost several very valuable pieces of furniture and a lot of kitchen equipment after I’d forgotten where I’d left it to dry.
Then I got the idea to paint myself, cautiously at first, so I just painted one arm - the looks I got reassured me that it would work on the rest of me - sure enough it did and I’m now writing this from inside Buckingham Palace after walking nonchalantly past the security guards and the corgies without so much as a how-do-you-do. You can see how well it works, the picture above is me (on the left) sitting next to my brother in law.
The original Invisible Man probably had the same idea as me, but I think mine is better. It could have a serious scientific use in the future, but I’ll have to think about what that might be.
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