Doctor, Doctor...
By Dave Hall
For all you hypochondriacs out there, Dave Hall continues his regular look at a some of the more unusual medical conditions, as well as some you thought you knew all about.
This week: DRACULA'S TEETH SYNDROME.
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Condition – Not a case of bad dentistry, but a rather more mental condition in which the patient believes they have a pair of large canines protruding from their upper jaw. Often occurring because of in-growing teeth or after some have been removed, the tooth’s impression is still felt in the mouth leading to an unusual phenomenon of phantom supernumerary teeth.
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Contagion – None known – it’s all in the mind.
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| Danger of death – Whilst unlikely to kill you, it can make sufferers go stir crazy with the constant vampire teeth feeling in their mouth. This often results in suicide. |  |
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Incurability? – Psychological treatment may well help the patient in the long term. No one is sure whether drinking blood can have short term healing powers.
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Likelihood of getting time off work – If your boss thinks their life is in danger every time you go into their office, you’ll get time off at your leisure. Wear a cape and dark eye make-up and you’ll only enhance the effect.
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| Brag-ability – Your mates might think you're a little strange if you wear fake fangs to go along with the condition, but it will only help to make it more convincing. Be careful to take them out before you eat anything, and don't go ordering pints of the red stuff down the local. |
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Overall ridiculousness – Not life-threatening, but damn crazy in our opinion. |
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More conditions to come soon:
SARS, Sick Building Syndrome and more.
Find more curious conditions in Doctor Doctor. If you can't wait for the next Doctor Doctor, then why not find a Phunny Phobia to keep you going?
Photo: Israel Jiménez, SXC
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