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Top Ten Funny Acronyms

Top Ten Funny Acronyms



If there's one thing we like at the Null it's inappropriate words. Imagine our joy then when Alastair Alexander sent us in his top ten stupid sciency acronyms. With all the maturity of a five year old on coke we sniggered and snorted our way through the list. There's a time for sharp, topical humour. That time is not now.



THE NULL'S TOP TEN FUNNY ACRONYMS
(click on the links for the inside story)


R.U.D.E. and C.R.U.D.E.
Straight in to the "make it memorable" section comes RUDE and CRUDE. They're paired in this instance so counted as one. RUDE is a Real-time UDP Data Emitter, naturally... (more)

D.A.F.T
Dust and Aerosol Measurement Feasibility Test is an acronym used by NASA. It seems that very little is known about the size range of soot particles in space. As oxygen is limited up there... (more)

C.A.R.P.
Contrast, Alignment, Repetition, Proximity. Words to remember for design and layout. CARP is something to bear in mind when you’re starting to design a page layout, or indeed most kinds of... (more)

P.I.S.S.
The Phoenix Islands Resettlement Scheme. I wish I was making this one up. In 1938, as an effort to ease over-population problems on the Gilbert and Ellis Islands in the Pacifc, a plan was drawn up... (more)

O.N.A.N.
Oil Natural Air Natural. It's a cooling method, honest. Chapter 38 of the Old Testament book of Genesis recounts the tale of Onan, who spilled his seed on the ground and was punished for it... (more)

A.R.S.E.
The American Association of Cardiovascular and Pulmonary Rehabilitation Risk Stratification Criteria for Clinical Events. The most tenuous and poorly constructed acronym ever?... (more).

B.U.M.
UN Food and Agriculture Organization code for blue marlin. The blue marlin feeds on fish and squid. It has a dark blue body with a white underside, and a long bill. It's one of the fastest fishes... (more)

S.M.E.G.
Société Monégasque de l'Electricité et du Gaz. A word brought into common parlance by 80s sit-com "Red Dwarf", it's also the acronym representing the Monacan electricity and gas supplier... (more)

F.A.R.T.
Fire Alarm Response Team. Bearing in mind that a fire alarm at a hotel is a very serious and complex incident to deal with, it goes without saying that there would be a team of people charged with the duty... (more)

P.O.O.P.
Procedural Object Oriented Programming - Object Oriented Programming has been with us for years, and it's inevitable that at some point the letter 'P' would get placed in front of it... (more)



Your Say

Nice article. A couple of additions of the undoubted thousands you're going to get:
S.H.A.G. Sexual Health Action Group. I think this was Brighton Council, but I can't remember.
C.R.A.P. Career Review Action Plan. The woman who came up with it was most put out when someone pointed out that her idea was... er...
Jim Keir

If these childish delights have left you wanting more - we've got loads of other top tens:
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